Australian Film Festival at IIC – Film Review

The Tall Man

Written and Directed by Tony Krawitz, ‘The Tall Man’ is a documentary based on a book of the same name by Chloe Hooper. The documentary is a puzzle which takes the audience on a roller coaster ride to determine the truth behind the famous Cameroon Domadgee death in custody case.

An inebriated Cameroon was arrested one morning for swearing at Senior Sergeant Chris Hurley, and just an hour later he was found dead in the Palm Island police station. The police claimed that Domadgee died because he fell and slipped when entering the cell. Nobody cared to explain how he got such bad injuries by just falling: four broken ribs, a badly ruptured liver and condition as bad as after a car accident.

The documentary uses court transcripts, interviews with Doomadgee’s family and fellow residents and video footage of Hurley re-enacting his version of that day’s event. It also touches upon Palm Island’s colonial history where racism was widespread. 

The filmmaker plays fair by allotting almost the same time to Hurley’s supporters as he does to Domadgee’s. The local people of Palm Island would refer to Chris Hurley who was 6 ft 7 in. tall and weighed 115 kg as ‘The Tall Man’ (of the title) because of his giant physique. The documentary highlights the difficulty to bring him to trial, and his final acquittal makes us question the Judiciary. Krawitz couldn’t convince Chris Hurley to be in the film. The film ends with the results of the final investigation conducted in 2010, including an audio recording of Hurley’s statement.

Go Back to Where You Came From: Series 2

The documentary film shows us the lives of refugees and the difficulties they face trying to lead a normal life. The filmmaker tried a new genre of documentary film making i.e., a reality TV show format. This fresh approach makes us as an audience more interested, captivated and receptive. Refugees are vulnerable and prone to exploitation and violence. With no protection and no rights, they are completely helpless. This documentary does try and bring out the debate of asylum seekers in the open.

We were shown Episodes 2 and 3 from Season 1 of the documentary. It begins with a mini introduction of all the 6 participants – their names, ages, backgrounds and their opinion on the Australia's asylum seeker debate. Except one of the participants, all the rest shared a common hatred for refugees and this included an absolute racist (Raquel) and a complete Muslim hater (Adam). From being a part of  immigration raids in Malaysia, to living in a refugee camp in Kenya, from visiting slums in Jordan and going to war torn countries like Congo and Iraq – the participants do it all.

The film screening was followed by a discussion with filmmaker Rick McPhee. During which a woman said that the participants take more of our attention and sympathy than the refugees. Though she meant it otherwise, I felt that was the biggest advantage of the film. It worked well because, in order to win the asylum seekers debate in their favor, we need to convince people who are anti-refugees first. And the film does that easily, as it strikes a chord with especially such people and makes them think. They connect with participants who are challenged by the situations they are put in and change completely by the end of their journey. If the participants on the show could have a change of heart, so can other such people. The documentary gives us all a ray of hope.

Animated Shorts Review

Gopher Broke

The animated short film ‘Gopher Broke’ is about a gopher living on the countryside who is shown trying hard to procure vegetable/fruits in the film to eat. It opens with the sign board which reads ‘Farmers house’ and then at the root of the board we see the gopher. It is in this way that the main character – the gopher is introduced.

The characterization of the gopher is very good. He has an innocent looking face and has two big frontal teeth which further show his gullibility and country fool characteristic. The naiveté and yet the clever tactics he applies to procure food reveal to us the interesting character that he is.

He is on a road where trucks are moving produce to market. He digs a pit on the road so that every time a truck passes it jumps up and fruits-vegetables fly into the sky. The fruits-vegetables are shown in slow motion for added effect, and the sparkle in his eyes when this happens is a very heartwarming moment. But he can never really enjoy the feast as the crows always get it before him.

The audience feels sorry for him, we connect with him because we have seen him try for food, get really close and then get disappointed. We too get disappointed with him.

The film has a comical ending, as this time around a truck carrying a cow passes and jumps up because of the same pit he had dug. The animal then flies out and lands on the poor gopher! Following this we see the truck go away with the cow in it and the gopher stuck on his behind! :D

A very cute short, with a simple storyline and basic human emotions we can connect too.

A Gentlemen's Duel

This animated short film opens like a typical princess in the castle or fairy tale. We see a beautiful pond, with two frogs trying to have the same butterfly. Then the frame expands and we see a very pretty lady looking out from the balcony to the left and there the title of the film is shown.

The film as the name suggests is about two men fighting for a girl. The girl like in all classical fairy tales is shown as a passive participant who has a pretty face. The characterisation of the two men is very interesting, one is very English and the other is very French in his appearance. So the classic rivalry between the English and the French is revived.

They fight verbally, bicker over the lunch, but the main fight happens with the men running huge robots. In this too fun is made of English traditions like the evening tea. In the middle of the fight, at a very decisive moment the servant comes and rings a tiny bell. All of a sudden the fighting stops and we see both the men and the lady at table sipping tea like civilized human beings!

Once it’s over, they return and resume from exactly where they had left. Finally after a lot of destruction, they realize the woman is missing and later see her boots under a boulder. Assuming that she is dead, they both run away. We see all the destruction they’ve caused and then see rustling in the nearby bush. We then see the lady naked in the bush smiling - we wonder who is she with and we soon see the servant pop out of the shrub too. So somewhere in the middle, the lady had gone out with the servant leaving both the men to fight! :) An unconventional end to a very predictable plotline. 

German Expressionism and Architecture in Cinema

Introduction

The Expressionist movement began in Germany around the 1900’s. Originally the idea was for the artist to produce a piece of work entirely from a subjective point of view. Popular examples are: The Scream by Edward Munch, and Starry Night by Van Gogh.

Expressionism in architecture also began in Germany around the early 1900’s. It refers to German, Dutch, Czech, Austrian and Danish Avante Gard from 1910-30. Architecture showing original, unique design was popular.  Research from Sigmund Freud and Karl Jung helped start the Expressionist movement. There was more focus on the psychological effects of form and space when designing. Socialist government was repressing towards art, it was a way to act out for the artists/architects. 

Characteristics:

• Distortion of the form to invoke emotion
• Striving to be new and original
• Heavy use of ‘Artisan Craftsmanship’
• The idea of architecture as a work of art

Some e.g. of buildings:

• Einsteins tower - This was built by Erich Mendelsohn and is the most iconic representation of expressionism in architecture.
• Goetheanum - This can be found in Dornach, Switzerland. It is the world centre for anthroposophical movement.  Designed by Rudolph Steiner, this building is basically a perfect definition of expressionist architecture.

Cinema and Architecture

Many critics see a direct tie between cinema and architecture of the time, stating that the sets and scene artwork of Expressionist films often reveal buildings of sharp angles, great heights, and crowded environments, such as the frequently shown Tower of Babel in Fritz Lang’s Metropolis.

This film movement paralleled Expressionist painting and theater in rejecting realism. The creators of the time sought to convey inner, subjective experience through external, objective means. Their films were characterized by highly stylized sets and acting; they used a new visual style which embodied high contrast and simple editing. The films were shot in studios where they could employ deliberately exaggerated and dramatic lighting and camera angles to emphasize some particular affect - fear, horror, pain.

So I discuss two films belonging to the early Expressionist phase (1920’s and 30’s): The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari (1920), and Metropolis (1927). Films then were highly symbolic and deliberately surrealistic portrayals of filmed stories. The extreme non-realism of Expressionism was short-lived, and it faded away (along with Dadaism) after only a few years. However, the themes of Expressionism were integrated into later films of the 1920s and 1930s, resulting in an artistic control over the placement of scenery, light, and shadow to enhance the mood of a film. Therefore I discuss two recent films influenced by German Expressionism: Blade Runner (1982) and Batman Returns (1992) in my paper very briefly before I end.

 

The Cabinet of Doctor Caligari (1920)

With this movie, director Robert Wiene created a masterpiece.  Not only is the story interesting and engaging, but nearly every shot in the movie looks like an Expressionist painting.   The sets, designed by Hermann Warn along with to painters, Walter Rohrig and Walter Reinmann, are filled with strange angles, triangular doors, and crooked roofs.  Complex and intricate architecture, odd stairways, and bizarre props such as giant stools near enormously tall desks all serve to give the film a unique look. The entire production feels like the dream of a madman.

The characters too have been worked upon.  The heavy, exaggerated make-up with sharp angular lines painted across the characters faces and the triangular costumes serve to accent the sets and props.   No film has ever captured insanity so well. The lighting is very important in this film, and a key aspect to expressionist film.  The stark, harsh, shadow filled lighting gives all of the scenes a nightmarish quality.  The sets are painted with shadows which makes the movie even more eerie and otherworldly than it would have been otherwise.  In one of key and often imitated moments in the film, a murder is shown only as shadows on a wall. 

This scene demonstrates the effect created through the Expressionist technique of using angular structures to help represent a disjointed mood and a nightmarish atmosphere.

Cesare’s movements were stiff and robotic. His makeup was excessive and overdone. Some of the shadows in this scene were created by wall paintings to enhance contrast between light and dark. The “Cabinet of Dr. Caligari” employed the Expressionist technique of using dream sequences and flashbacks to twist reality and warp chronology.The unnatural and exaggerated character of Cesare carried out frightening acts during the dream sequences.

Designed by the Expressionist Bahaus School, the films’ sets were contorted and artificial. The distorted designs helped to develop the atmosphere of disorientation.

Metropolis (1927)

Fritz Lang's film Metropolis demonstrates a visually progressive 'Futurist' society dealing with relevant issues of 1920s Germany in relation to labour and society. It contains a lot of weird, futuristic elements that have stuck with science fiction ever since they first appeared in this movie, and the shots of the robot with electricity in circles around her has become quite iconic.

In keeping with Expressionist concepts, Lang portrayed women in the unnatural form of machines.

Huge sets that dwarf the actors is very well evidenced by the enormous power plant and glimpses of the massive yet pristine 'upper' city.

Lang accentuated the dark mood of the film by including lighting practices characteristic of Expressionist cinema.

Blade Runner (1982)

Many analysts believe that Expressionist media often contains an underlying and ambiguous social critique. In the science fiction movie, “Blade Runner”, directed by Ridley Scott, poetic speeches contained vague political themes and ideologies.

In the manner of Expressionism, Ridley Scott incorporated dark shadows, hazy lighting and odd camera movements into the film. In addition to the parallels to movie “Metropolis”, “Blade Runner” imitated sequences from other German Expressionist films. Bladerunner’s emphasis on the degraded, alienating city resembled that of many expressionist "street films" taken together. Some propose that “Bladerunner” was a remake of Lang's Metropolis. 

Similar to the earlier Expressionist film, “Metropolis” (above), “Bladerunner” portrayed a futuristic city as bleak and dark (below). 

Ridley Scott contrasted light and dark and used straight angles and silhouettes.

Batman Returns (1992)

Ambitious adaptations of the style are depicted throughout the contemporary filmography of director Tim Burton. His 1992 film Batman Returns is often cited as a modern attempt to capture the essence of German Expressionism. The angular building designs and severe-looking city squares of Gotham City evoke the loom and menace present in Lang’s Metropolis. The angular building designs and severe looking city squares of Gotham City bore resemblance to Lang’s futuristic city. The urban design of Gotham city resembled a dream or nightmare like landscape. A variety of architectural styles including Expressionism were borrowed from in the creation of the city.

Conclusion

I would conclude with the following quote which sums up Expressionist movement as a whole:

“The Expressionist does not see, he has visions”

-         German Expressionist writer, Kasimir Edschmid, (1919)

This holds true for expressionism everywhere, be it buildings, paintings, theatre or films. 

Sights and Sounds at Okhla Vegetable Market - Part II

Location: Okhla Vegetable Market

Time: 04:10 a.m. to 5:30 a.m.

20 sounds that I liked:

1. Namaz – coming from the tent put up for the auspicious Ramzan season.
2. The sound of stray dogs being kicked intentionally or unintentionally, in any crowded places is common.
3. ‘Aao! Aao!’ – Shopkeepers keep shouting this to lure customers.
4. ‘70 Rs. bahot ho gaya’ – the price may change but this is one dialogue you get to hear from both the customers and the shopkeepers.
5. As a vegetable market is a crowded place the commotion of people, the mixing of chatter, with the sound of walking and other activities creates a noise unique to the place.
6. ‘Hato!’ – Very commonly heard by the workers carrying big sacks or huge boxes on there backs when somebody is blocking there way.
7. A radio playing in the background is common to a lot of places, but a vegetable market is one place where in order to here it you would have to close your eyes and feel it.
8. ‘Papita!?’ – the item may change, they may know you are not there to shop, but a good vendor will never let an opportunity pass by to inquire if you need something.
9. ‘Puch ke laga cheezein’ – a shopkeeper instructing a worker under him, or a father teaching his son, this is very often heard in various forms.
10. Sound of the honking of cars from the road, and the trucks in the mandi are a constant sound effect in a vegetable market.
11. Thumping noises caused by beating of hand against the sides of a truck, signaling it to back or stop is common here. This avoids any mishaps and allows smooth movement in the market.
12. When vegetables like potatoes, onions, corncobs etc. are dumped, along comes a lot of dust and irritants which can cause coughing. So coughing is another common sound.
13. Sound of dumping of sacks, after they have been packed into the truck.
14. Taking off the big brown tapes that seal the fruit boxes is another frequently heard sound, especially near the fruit shops.
15. As the ‘Okhla Sabzi Mandi’ is near a railway stop, you can constantly hear the train’s horn whenever one passes by.
16. By the time we were leaving, it had started raining. And there was already a big puddle on one side. So whenever a truck would pass, it would make a splashing noise.
17. ‘Aye rickshaw!’ – used to call a rickshawala, grab his attention for some work.
18. ‘Kacha, Hara’ – sometimes the vendors use innovative words like these to grab the customers’ attention. He says ‘Kacha, Hara’ but doesn’t specify what he is selling. It could be anything dhaniya, chilly, banana, mango, beans, capsicum, bitter gourd, etc. so when you hear this, you tend to look for the shop and see what he is selling. Good marketing strategy!
19. As we were exiting, a man’s mobile started ringing in a funny Bollywood ring tone. It was funny and at the same time very symbolic of our visit. As that was the only moment when people around us actually silenced a bit, to see where it was coming from.
20. Whistling – I spotted these few people who were using whistling as some kind of codes to call out to each other and signal certain actions. It actually comes handy in a crowded and difficult to move around environment like a vegetable market. 

Sights and Sounds at Okhla Vegetable Market - Part I

Location: Okhla Vegetable Market

Time: 04:10 a.m. to 5:30 a.m.

20 visuals that I liked:

1. Just outside the ‘Okhla Vegetable Market’ something interesting caught my eye. As it’s a wholesale market, a lot of trucks and tempos, had been parked outside. These created good frames, beside the pavement. One such was a green tempo parked in front of an orange truck, and the space in the middle that was left you could see a family sleeping on the dusty pavement.
2. Another visual that I found interesting while still outside was the array of vegetable carrying bicycles. I hadn't expected to spot these, and I have been to vegetable markets before, but obviously not one this big. These bicycles looked adorable; they had woven vegetable baskets tied to the front of the handle bars, and a really big one secured near the seat. Standing in lines, or even when pictured alone they made for a pretty sight.
3. As it was early morning when we visited the ‘Okhla Sabzi Mandi, some people could be found sleeping. But what amazed me how different their beds and sleeping positions were! For e.g. I saw a man sleeping on vegetable plastic baskets, stacked together to make a bed. And another basket which had been kept upside down right next to him had a goat sleeping on it.
4. As we went in further, I spotted a fruit seller, who had a huge tent with watermelons under them. And one could clearly see that he was having a good time as he was quickly selling them off, though it was still so early. It was a good day for him! But right next to his shop, two young men slept on a wooden hawker’s cart. This made the visual very interesting, while the watermelon vendor was sending off truckloads of melons away, among all this commotion and activity these two men just slept through it all.
5. On going further we saw to our right, a lot of Muslims offering their early morning namaz. Special seating arrangements had been made for the auspicious Ramzan season, to host a large number of people. From the market where I stood, you could look into the tent through a gap and see the namaz proceedings.
6. Then I saw a truck, which was being loaded with sacks full of potatoes and onions. There were two workers at the back of the truck, one with the light guiding the other one with the sack. They made a very homely picture.
7. As we approached the area from where the market properly began, I spotted another interesting truck. It had been parked on a slope and had a street light illuminating the back end of the truck. It had a man on the top who was pulling a cover on top of the truck. Because of the slope and the man pulling it in the direction of the slope with all his might, this sight symbolized for me strength and hard work at the vegetable market.
8. Men with weird backpacks caught my attention as we were walking in the main market now. From a distance I couldn't make out what it was. It took me a while to see that they were not really backpacks, but contraptions made by them to lift a bag full of vegetables and carry it easily till the truck. They were all white in color and made of the white plastic sacks that one sees at markets. It had a small wooden block tied on the end, to sport the box or the sack.
9. A very charming fruit shop was something that stood out in a ‘vegetable’ market. There were other fruits shops too, but this one just marked its presence, the vendor must have spent quite some time in setting it up. It had fruits arranged in such a way that it looked like a fort of fruits, the front was lower and the backside was higher. So one could just stand and scan all the fruits easily. The vacant chair in the middle and a weighing matching just added more to the charm. Also fruit baskets and trays hung on strings from the rooftop lining the shop.
10. On one end of the market we saw a corncob wholesaler. This was the biggest corncob shop I think. It was huge and had one man sitting at one corner peeling the excess leafs off them. And one man who helped him was standing next to him. The heaps of already peeled corncobs lay below, which was being managed by two other people who were helping to get them loaded on trucks standing nearby.
11. There was an attention-grabbing man selling potatoes at the market. Though dressed in a normal banyan, lungi and smoking a beedi, there was something remarkable about him which made him so unlike others. He also had a ‘change’ pouch hanging off a really long string on his neck. It looked like he was some character out of a book.
12. There was also a shop selling only packed Khajoor (dates). To go with the festive season of Ramzan and the upcoming Eid. Packed in clear transparent plastic bags and reflecting the light from the bulbs, the Khajoor looked really glossy and silken! Appetizing enough to compel anybody to buy them.
13. Near one of the tea stalls in the market, was a big weighing machine placed. And beside it was kept a charpoy. So the hardworking men could be seen lifting heavy sacks placing them on the weighing machine, then sealing them and taking them to the truck. Whereas on the charpoy right next to it, young men who are lazy bums (you could make out by there behavior) just kept lazing around. One even got scolded by his dad for not working. It showed the contrast very clearly.
14. Sometimes the ordinary looks so different, that it looks other worldly! I felt this when I couldn't recognize green bananas being sold at a shop, because of its placement. They had been placed one top of the other, with the top i.e. the place where they are connected to each other was facing us. So they looked like huge big green flowers, with every banana looking like a leaf to me. It felt like a scene from the evergreen African jungles. So green and so exotic!
15. Early morning and the smell of ‘Chai’ is sure to brighten anybody’s day. So we went and had tea at one of the tea stalls. It was much later that I noticed it reminded me of some place. I couldn't really say it aloud because I thought it sounded weird, but nevertheless I somehow said it. And to my relief Nagma agreed with me. The ‘Chai stall’ reminded one of being in a railway station! Its composition was such that it had a feel of being situated on a platform. For once I actually though that we were waiting for a train and not really in a vegetable market. We were surrounded by vegetables yet getting the feeling of being transported to another world altogether is no mean feat.
16. One of the vendors who was not making much sale, or maybe was unhappy about something sat on the weighing machine of his shop with a grumpy expression on his face.
17. The place where the sacks were being lifted on the backs of workers also had interesting sights. One that I liked was the way they lifted the sacks up. Another worker would help lift the bag, and then he would swing it in a peculiar way above his head, so that it landed on his back. It looked very smooth and there practice showed in the ease with which they were doing it.
18. Amongst the vegetables and fruits in the market, amongst the vibrant colors, a dairy shop is sure to stand out. Selling products like: milk, cheese, khoya, etc. – the shop looks very white! And stacked up on a silver shelf, it shines too. Very different from the rest of the market indeed.
19. At one of the exits/entrances, there was an interesting opening with a triangular top. Vegetable vendors sitting on both sides with light bulbs glowing in their shops, contrasted well with the black sky visible through the opening. The play of light and dark, made it eye catchy.
20. The shop that I liked the most was the one selling carrots and capsicums. It had two levels and an interesting background of colorful doors. On the floor lay the orange carrots, and up the stairs to the raised platform lay green capsicums. Workers could be seen cleaning the vegetables and packing them. Behind them was a dark green cupboard fixed into the wall, then a blue door and just next to it a bright green bigger door. Two sacks of carrots were kept on the left side of the platform. It was full, vibrant, rich and one of the best sights that I saw at the ‘Okhla Sabzi Mandi’.

The Shortest Poem

In July that year, when he first showed me emotions,
I saw a person who could cry for me,
Who felt pain if i was away. :)

But in April this year, when I saw him lie on my face,
It all came crashing down!
End of story. 


(Written at my Maasi's place while I was out with my parents, last piece written about my breakup. Will never write anything about it. Doesn't deserve that space in my head or heart anymore. And I thought he cared. :I )

27th May 2013, 05.04 pm. 

I bought your freedom

I bought your freedom my soft toy,

My green bunny, my cuddly boy

For this day, I saved my cash

So I could buy things and make it match,

Our expenses were almost the same,

He spent a little more, but he earned as well

I am still in college, so you can tell

How hard it must have been for me

Right in front my break up, I could see!

I could see it clearly coming my way,

So I did the best I could to pay,

Him somehow the money for my cute little baby,

Cause I knew that is something I could never give up, maybe

A clever decision, I am proud of it now

Decluttering my life, getting space to grow.

I bought your freedom my soft toy,

My green bunny, my cuddly boy!

Today when removing all those memory triggers from my life,

I am glad I literally ‘bought’my bunny back!

Leaving him would’ve be even more painful than the actual breakup,

It was love at first sight,

It was love at first sight,

His bright green fur, lights up my life! :D

(I know the last two lines are hilarious, but I wrote this poem in jest and it suited the mood and the flow, I was happy writing it, so didn’t change anything)  :)
written while preparing for exams on 12^th may 2013 at 12:45 pm

Ups and Downs...

Ups and downs in life 
Come and go
I cry, I fell down
Back on my toes
Got a broken heart 
Put a band-aid, off I go
All said and done I know one thing for sure
I love my dad the most!

I wish to find someone like him,
But seeing people around, I drop my whim
My dad is creative, intelligent, a helping hand
But most of all he loves my mom so much
It shows in his eyes.
There love so strong, 
There love so sweet.
How could I ever find someone like him!?

Oh papa, I love you and my heart cries for another you,
Who could love me as much as you do,
Can I truly find another you?

Ups and downs in life 
Come and go
I cry, I fell down
Back on my toes
Got a broken heart 
Put a band-aid, off I go
All said and done I know one thing for sure,
I love my dad the most!

Written sometime in April 2013 :) 

It felt so right 'to me'

I held onto his every word,
I believed everything, he said
blind to the core
where the fuck was my head? =0

Proud of my brains,
intelligent than the rest,
that's what I thought,
about myself,
till I met you!

You who put everything in perspective,
I know now, I too do have a heart
Cause otherwise it wouldn't have hurt so much.
I thought I coudln't cry for anyone
except myself, but now I cry every night
For could I not see
it clearly then?
How could I be so stupid?

Even now when I know the reality,
Why do I still believe everything he said,
At times when I am alone or even
when with people
A song or a line reminds me of him
tears well up my eyes and I cry.

My gut feeling was always right,
but this is proving me wrong,
and that hurts more than anything
it felt so right 'to me'
But it felt so right 'to me'

Written during the end of March 2013 in class.

It’s very difficult for me

Look it’s very difficult for me

To pretend as if everything’s all right

When nothing is going right between us

It’s difficult to keep laughing

When all I want is to cry

 I like talking to you

But when we have to part

Talking everyday to you

Will only make it harder for me later

Having said that, do whatever you feel is right

You know better

I don’t want to hold any hard feelings or grudges towards you

Please don’t make it hard for me than it already is!

Written on 14^th February 2013 – Valentine’s Day bwahahahaha 

Crossroads

Crossroads always come in your life

You choose one and let the other go

I always chose the one – right, good, practical for me

But, this one time it’s difficult

My life changes if I take the wrong turn, take the wrong pick or go with the wrong option

But no, it’s not only about that

Had it been, I would have been hesitant

In choosing my education, profession, even my location

But this one time, it’s different

Matters of the heart, fuck up the head

Rose coloured glasses, blur your vision

Confusion, utter madness takes over

And this frustration wells up my eyes

And I cry.

Why is it so difficult to let go and move on?

Why is it so difficult to forget and start anew, afresh?

All will be, all right in time to come

My heart will heal and pieces fuse back into one,

But this period, of deciding to hold on or let go,

Is difficult, it’s killing me.

No I am not depressed,

I can still laugh and make people laugh,

Still do my work well, and go out and shop

But despite all the pretense, the outward appearance

I know something’s amiss

I am not me anymore

And I want this to end.

I am afraid of taking a wrong turn, choosing the wrong bend.

Crossroads always come in life,

You choose one and let the other go,

That is how we grow!

(I hope I am able to choose right and grow out of it soon)

Written on 12^th February 2013

Sometimes I feel...

Sometimes I feel you mean so little to me,

Do I even love you?

Love you enough as to stay with you for long even if not forever!

Then I go back through all the memories we’ve shared,

Through all the stupid pranks and silly fights,

Our nicknames and code words,

My laughter that echoes through years that have passed,

Between you, me, between both of us.

Would I have it someone?

Would I like to have it with someone else?

I am unsure,

But when I have in you all that I need,

Why should I look for another you?

You mean a lot to me,

Yes I love you,

Love you enough to stay with you for long and maybe even forever!

written on 14 november 2012, 12:34 raat ko 

Magic for a Reason :)

I had interviewed Magician Akash P.R.  for the magazine Megarth - which showcases Social Leaders and Organizations, Individuals and Businesses that create exponential Social Change - here it is:

What is your definition of passion and when did you discover that magic is your passion?

Passion means madness to me, you keep thinking about it all the time, no matter where you are, what you are doing. You are unconsciously always thinking about it and drawing connections from your normal life, daily routine to that one thing that means the most to you – your passion! I discovered my passion or rather say realized my love for magic when I was in 5^th standard (approx). Everybody has witnessed some kind of magic as a kid even if not by a professional magician. Sometimes adults try to fool kids by telling them the reason for something rational that they can understand by telling them that its magic. That was beginning when a child is not taken in by the lies adults and the society around us tries to cook up. When you are not taken in by such lies you develop rationality after knowing how things works , you are ready to use the ability to create myth and illusion on your command and use it to entertain people. That is how I discovered my passion for magic. 

Whenever you go up on stage to perform, what are your thoughts before performing?

I only think about my act, how I am going to do it. I just concentrate on my performance. My mind is clean of any other thoughts except my next act. My support staff takes care of the rest.

Magic is one passion that energizes you, but what are other hobbies or activities you are involved in that keeps you happy?

Sketching is one hobby that has been a constant part of my life along with magic. I also paint and carve, modern art being my area of interest. Humming songs in my free time also keeps me energized and going.

There might be ups and downs in the pursuit of your passion but what keeps you motivated to move forward?

When a rough/low point comes in the pursuit of your passion, you sometimes feel like giving it all up and moving ahead with your life, with a lot less tension. But then because it is your passion, and you cannot stay away from it you come back to it and start working ways out. Sometimes when an act goes wrong due to some problem in stage, props, or human fault, after getting frustrated and saddened by it you come back and try to repair, fix or reduce chances of faults happening. You can never let go off your passion.

What is your source of inspiration for magic?

All creative people who have struggled hard and made a name for themselves be it in – singing, dancing, acting or magic, etc – they all inspire me. I love reading about them and there struggle for surviving against all odds inspires me to keep going.

Magic has an entertainment value but can this be used for any other purpose like spreading a social message?

Yes surely. Magic shows can be customized to suit any social cause and spread a message through such magic shows. We also have an organization MFR – Magic for a Reason which solely works for giving magic a human touch. We wish to impart social messages and uplift the society and remove the taboo associated with magic as black magic and not as a performing art.

Please share your thoughts about the perspective towards this form of art and its future.

Magic is an art form which needs no language to convey an idea to the audience. Magic has a universal language which everybody understands and everyone wants to see. But a lot of people still believe in black magic and don’t consider it an art form. We need to work on eradicating this idea from the masses.

The future looks bright for magic and if in India it gets the much needed government support and government gives it the status of a performing art. Only then it is possible that research and development in the field of magic will happen and it would be able to regain its lost glory in India once again!